Here is a schematic for conflict resolution. It takes emotionally mature people to handle it right. Unfortunately, I rarely find people who are willing and able to follow good practices without it getting emotional but why not challenge yourself to a better place.
- Bring up the problem…without emotion
- Let them ask questions to clarify, this person should not be defensive.
- Let them restate what they understood
- Then together come up with a plan to remedy it.
- You then let it go
- If need be you will mention again.
- It is important to note that after telling of the issue you let it go. Grace begets grace…
This grace issue is the most important part of the process. Without this no relationship can survive. When a list is made of offences, it is only a matter of time before someone cannot support its weight and then the problems really begin.
I read today that 67% of 2nd marriages and 73% of 3rd marriages fail. They said it was that people didn’t learn their lessons and change their behavior.
Learn your lessons and practice this on purpose next time you have an issue with a spouce or anyone else. Determine to get good at this.